Today I was to test the existence of God, aka Yahweh, by saying aloud some of the questions that The Book has claimed are ripe for getting God to appear and thus prove his existence. The suggestion in The Book was to do this on a mountain or hill as that seemed to be the place that most people saw God in the Bible. I instead chose to ask mine in a church.
We had a wedding to go to last night and while we were sitting in the chapel I just looked up to the rafters and asked "Are you there God?". I never got an answer but asked a second time just to be safe.
When that wasn't doing it for me I chose a different tactic. It was raining outside and has been for the past day or so. The Book suggested a taunting question to try and incur Gods wrath so I just looked up and said, "Bet you can't hit me with lightning". Diana didn't appreciate me saying this but I said it again for good measure. I was slightly afraid lightning would strike, thus ruining the wedding. I admit I would have been pretty embarrassed had that happened.
I didn't ever see God yesterday and was pretty disappointed. I was really hoping He would appear and thus end all the questions I had of his existence.
Some of the other things to attract God that I didn't get to use were
- "God, I have some important data about the Devil's latest plans. Come down and I will show you"
- "Show me a miracle God and I will sacrifice any animal you care to mention"
- "Hey God, I'm angel Bob. I've lost my wings somewhere over there. Help me out"
I particularly like the one with the Devil.
That is all,
Newt
5 Ripples in the pond:
He’ll be in touch. He’s been a bit busy lately, what with having a lot of people to smite, but he’ll get round to you as soon as he can.
I would have been terribly ashamed of myself if God actually struck me with lightening during a wedding.... :( It would have made me very sad, I am also very glad God wasn't listen to your ridiculousness because I like reading your blog.
What would happen if you asked God to prove he doesn't exist?
Ooooh, I just hurt my brain!
Lizz, I am glad you like reading my blog and was also glad I didn't die by lightning strike yesterday.
S&C, please don't blow my mind with questions that will cause me to ponder for days. It is very frustrating because I don't know the answer.
Simon, I hope you are wrong. I have plans next week.
He was probably at the VMA awards ... or maybe he had a wedding to go to ...
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