Owls make me uncomfortable

I went to Hooters for lunch today and I have to say that eating there makes me uncomfortable. I would say that going to Hooters is the closest I have come to a strip club because I am paying to look at boobies. I rarely go eat there because of my discomfort. Normally, I get a waitress that is extremely well endowed (as was the case today) and I will try so hard not to look at her bulbous cleavage that I will immediately become self-conscious about it.

Then I spend the rest of my meal watching myself to make sure that I don't accidentally let my eyes stray. This is doubly ridiculous because the girls that work at Hooters are aware that their ta-ta's are the focus of the dining experience and have no problem with it.

Also, I cannot stand boob veins. They disgust me. If girl’s boobs are so big that a blue vein is visible in their cleavage, they shouldn't be visible. I just get a shiver of gross when I even think about it. They almost look like a tattoo.

Needless to say, my lunch was good but I just stared across the table at my coworkers or out a window. I think this is why I have never gone to a strip club. I just wouldn't feel comfortable staring at a girls love pillows as a past time. Not that I wouldn't look, I would just feel uncomfortable.
That is all,

Newt