Wednesday, December 02, 2009

TBWCYL Day 336 - Wine-O

Howdy all. I am slightly tipsy and becoming a wine connoisseur at the moment. This was a task I could get behind. I was supposed to become a Wine Master by following these four steps.

I opened a bottle of Montes Classic Series 2008 Cabernet Sauvignon that was in my wine bar, I think I may have bought it on discount from somewhere, and poured myself a glass. It had an angel on the bottle and looked fancy.

Step 1: Swirl
I swirled the glass but it was really full so I didn't get the effect I was looking for. The color of the wine is a rich rouge and it has very little leg on it. Again that may be due to the size of the glass.

Step 2: Sniff
With my honker that isn't a problem. The smell is acidic in nature with a slightly subtle hint of rubbing alcohol to it.
Step 3: Taste
Wine in my mouth. Yep, that is wine. Just kidding. I took a sip and let the wine hit all parts of my tongue. The acid makes the tip tingle and the back of my throat burn. Clearly this was discount wine as it leaves my tongue with that burned feeling that makes you know your taste buds have met their match.

Step 4: Spit
Fuck That! I don't spit out alcohol and anyone who says you should is a stupid ass piece of poop that smells like patchouli and looks like Chelsea Clinton. Sorry, Chelsea. You aren't attractive.

Well, I guess I still have about half a bottle to finish off of this fantastic year in wine. I suppose I should have eaten something first but....zzzzzzzz.

3 Ripples in the pond:

Carrie said...

Hahaha. I'm loving your reaction to number four. :) I've never really understood the spitting either.

Soda and Candy said...

I was given a bottle of super expensive French red wine once, but I don't really drink it, so it sat in the kitchen in all kinds of ridiculously variable temperatures for a few months and when I finally opened it, it tasted like battery acid.

Trinity said...

That is a shame. Tsk tsk.