Thursday, June 04, 2009

TBWCYL Day 155 - Hail Mary Play

Some people may not know this but I can't say 'I believe in God', at least not in the traditional sense. I understand the need for religion and even like the idea in theory but just never have been a believer. However, if you don't engage me in discussions about it I usually keep my opinions to myself.


I also would like to point out that even though I am very skeptical about organized religion, I am respectful of it. I don't use the Lord's name in vain, I am very respectful in churches, and I respect The Bible. So, today's task was pretty bad when you consider that it is a direct mockery of religion. I was to go to a confessional today, catholic or not, and confess my sins to a priest. I decided to take a moral stand on teasing God so instead I found a suitable alternative.


Absolution Online


I can confess my sins in the same manner as in a confessional and get my penance. So, some of the sins I took to confession? And they have a handy rating system for sins. It is A to E where A is the worst and E is the least sinful.


Minor Sins
Consulting Horoscopes - Class E: This was done on a task so I owned up to it.
Excessive Consumerism - Class C: I spend $40 a week on comics and eat out like crazy.
Greed - Class D: I figure I am greedy at least some times so I threw this in to be safe.
Missing Mass on any Sunday or Holy Day of Obligation - Class A: I haven't been to church in so long I forget what it looks like.
Vandalism - Class D: Another task. The Book is making me sin...I didn't know that.


Physical Sins
Any use of or purchasing of pornographic material - Class A: What can I say...I like to take care of business.
Fornication...premarital sex - Class A: This was an old one but I got the milk for free for a long time before I bought the cow. You know what I'm sayin'?
Masturbation - Class A: See Pornographic Material. There isn't a class higher than A but I should probably get an A+ on this one.
Oral sex - Class D: Shhhhhhh
Use of artificial birth control - Class A: OHHHH YEAHHH!!!!

Internal Sins(These were fun to pronounce)
Delectatio Morosa - the pleasure taken in a sinful thought or imagination even without desiring it - Class C: I have these all the time. I like sinful thoughts.
Gaudium - dwelling with complacency on sins already committed - Class C: Check! Like this one time...sorry. My mind started to wander.
Desiderium - the desire for what is sinful - Class B: Forbidden Fruit...ummmm!!!


Seven Deadly Sins
Vainglory (Pride) - Class A: Diana told me I had to do the highest on this. If she were as smart as me she would have seen that I don't have much of a problem with this.
Avarice - Class E: I had to look this definition up but I don't have much for gaining money. Stuff sure, but not money.
Gluttony - Class D: I eat too much...I drink too much...I want too much...TOO MUCH!!!
Lust - Class B: I am not even sure that there is any reason to say anything here.
Sloth - Class E: I don't get up early to work out but I make sure my yard is mowed.
Envy - Class D: Erin got a 32" TV a week after I bought a 27". I still haven't let it go.
Anger - Class E: I am actually pretty proud of this because while I become annoyed, perturbed, and frustrated I rarely become angry.


Ten Commandments
I am not counting "Gods Before Him" because I don't have any other Gods either.
Idolatory - Class C: I have an entire room dedicated to a super hero. Golden Calf anyone?
Blasphemy - Class A: I am so guilty of this it isn't funny. Actually, it is kinda funny.
Failure to Respect the Sabbath - Class C: I don't attend church and I am sick of Chick-Fil-A being closed on Sunday.
Theft - Class D: This is much more from my past but I steal CoffeeMate from the fridge at work.
Lying - Class C: I am pretty good at lying. Ask Diana.
Coveteousness - Class C: I don't mind if you have what I want, I want us both to have it.


So, I finished my confession and put all my sins in my "shopping cart" and off I went to confessional. The result...


So, it appears I will be starving for 3 weeks and pretty busy yelling "Mary" and "Father". So if you don't hear from me assume that is why.


Funny story. One of the sins was Felching. I didn't know what it was so I looked it up on the Wiki. Click here is you don't know. I wasn't guilty of it though, just to clear your minds


That is all,

Newt

3 Ripples in the pond:

Erin said...

I didn't realize the TV thing was still with you. I'm sorry to have caused you such pain and an additional Hail Mary.

Girl Interrupted said...

Looks like I'm going to Hell for sure.

Oh well.

Have a great weekend, Trinity

Trinity said...

Hail Mary, Hail Mary, Hail Mary. OK. Now that I have that out of the way, yes Erin, I can't let it go. One of my life's greatest regrets is that I only own a 27' TV. I will never make this mistake again.

Kate, Yes if Hell existed I would be going there. Sucks to be me.