Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Stupid Multiplication

Well, I just read that Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant. Sister to Britney, Jaime is 16 and has been with the father for a while. He was described as "long time boyfriend." At 16, what is considered long time?

This news is scary because it seems that stupid people are multiplying at an alarming rate. I am not trying to insult people who get pregnant at a young age. I don't think it is the smartest thing to do because accidents happen. I do not, however, think it is a good idea.

There is a movie called Idiocity in which the human race gets populated with stupid people because they kept reproducing with other stupid people, while the smart people paired up and waited loner and longer to have children. It lead to people watching TV shows about getting kicked in the nuts and having a pro wrestler be President.

I know we make leaps and bounds in the medical and technological communities on a daily basis but I see how we could end up in that area. Punctuation has gone the way of the dodo, the word like is put into every sentence, and the Wayan's Brothers have a career. That in itself is proof that we are faltering.

On a daily basis, I get at least two emails that aren't capitalized which drives me crazy. Music is littered with thur's(there) and fashizees. What the hell does that even mean? I just don't want to see the world become that movie and it could. Scary.

That is all,

Newt

Sunday, December 16, 2007

I have been violated

I know I was complaining about my lights a few days ago but yesterday morning I discovered something disturbing. Some snot nosed little punk ran up to my front door and cut both of extension cords to the Christmas lights.

So, either I have pissed off my neighbor or the fact that the lights were crooked aggravated an escaped psychotic patient with OCD and caused him to cut my cords to prevent them from being seen. I went back up today and fixed the cord issues and now none of my cords run outside where "the Snipper" can't get to them.

What kind of person is so demented that they think it is ok to do this. How is this funny in any way? A practical joke is one thing but this is just vandalism. It did make me want to send an apology to my old neighbor whose window I broke and ran off without ever telling him. Sorry Curtis.

That is all,

Newt

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Lights, Camera, Traction

Well, as most of you know, Christmas is around the corner. This means presents and candy and for the first time in my life, putting lights on the house. For those of you who haven't seen my humble abode, this means I am putting my life at risk.

Our house isn't large but we do have two stories. I have never walked on my roof before but my wife wanted lights on the house and I aim to please. I began stringing lights on the roof three weeks ago and ran out with only half of the house done. A couple of days later, I found more of the same lights and got back on it.

After plugging the lights in, low and behold, there were pieces out. So up I go again to fix the lights. My OCD kicked in when I noticed that the lights weren't all standing straight up. So up I go again to straighten them out. Next, I ran out of those little clippy things that you use to attach lights to your house. Well, so did half of Dallas, Texas because I spent three hours driving around looking for more.

Finally I find more but the weather has been bad. I have been trying to get up on the roof for a week and on Saturday I grabbed my ladder and fixed the perimiter of mi casa. Still, it looks like crap. I still have lights all over my house that looks like redneck teeth.

So again, I climb up last night in the chilly drizzle and I'll be damned if the lights I fixed last week hadn't gone out again. So I spent thirty minutes trying to straighten and fix my lights.

Needless to say, they still aren't fixed. This is why Christmas can suck so bad.

That is all,

Newt

Monday, December 03, 2007

Spelling Follies - Part duh

Well, the Spellin' Felon has struck again. This was found at the same school a couple of weeks ago and I am just getting around to posting about it. It seems that Marshall Durham Middle School has a prankster in their midst. I am not sure what class Scince is but I know it wasn't part of the curriculum back when I was in 6th Grade.


Somehow I doubt this will be the last spelling error I will find.

That is all,

Newt